Guys here is why I as Developer Hate fucking Authorize.NET.
Simple..
- NONE OF THIS SAMPLE CODES WORKS.
- Logins dont work at all
----- Customer Support Blog Login - never works
----- you can not login into its FORUM (how the fuck we are suppose to post Bitches???)
----- NONE of its login systems are interconnected
- Code Samples / Packages (Are Fucking Horrible)
----- they never tells you which one we should use
----- You stumbled upon one - IT WONT WORK (God Mother Knows why!!!)
----- Sandbox was out for almost 4 months (Customer Care Says, I can see that. It works, but it didnt)
----- Stumbled up on test Scripts (it worked on support page with Transaction Login ID & Key)
----- I copied and pasted to TEST --- I DID NOT WORK
----- Bcoz, Libraries not provided
----- I had to Google & Download them from GitHub.
----- GitHub??? thats fucking crazy man. You put Source Code on GitHub???
----- I dont see why CANT ANYBODY HACK into AUTHORIZE.NET. EVEN TODAY!!!
----- GREAT, I download all modules in accordance with ERROR (Yes!!! It's Oh Fuck!!! moment for me)
----- Precisely -> 13 modules patiently.
----- TA TA DA moment THUNDER BOLT STRUCK
----- Class not loaded: Doctrine\Instantiator\InstantiatorInterfaceCharge Credit Card ERROR : Invalid response
----- COULDN'T DECODE WHAT IT MEANS.
----- EVEN Github dont have a module called. "InstantiatorInterfaceCharge.php" or anything related to it.
----- Then I tried to search of "InstantiatorInterfaceCharge" Class in entire folder --- NO FUCK. IT DOES NOT EXISTS.
----- CALL CUSTOMER CARE (NO they work only btw 8.45 PM to 4.30 PM SHARPIE
- Now CUSTOMER CARE
----- First of all, they dont give a shit to you...
----- you abuse them, politely they say DONT DO IT SIR.... (THEN HUNGUP ON YOUR FACE)
----- IF YOU repeat Abuse, they BLOCK YOUR NUMBER - YES THEY DO, DEAR...
----- for DEVELOPERS --- STANDARD ANSWER : Sorry Sir, I dont know what you talking about. Bcoz I am not a developer, send your coded to "developer@authorize.net" --- & --- mention BRIAN.
----- NO SURPRISE -- this BRIAN is a GHOST.
I KNOW HOW IT FEELS
Oh why the fuck they ask WHAT CODE ARE YOU USING???
I really wanted to say : "ONE I GOT ONE FROM YOUR MOTHER on HER BED" - OFFENSIVE???
FUNNY thing is this bastard RICHARD Admin @ Authorize.net community form poor motherfucker says there is SUCH no error??? either this mofo is blind or ILLITERATE BITCH
- About Authorized.NET
Was hacked by somebody & got away with huge amout & NEVER GET CAUGHT on 4th July 2004 (Yeh!!! Independence Day...)
- CyberSource.com bought it later
- Then VISA, yes your are right VISA Corp bought it. FUCKED!!!
- Authorize.net is CHEAP SHIT infront of PAYPAL.
- I DONT HAVE TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT PAYPAL TO DEVELOPERS. ONE CODE. YOUR ARE HOSTED
NOW YOU KNOW WHY I HATE AUTHORIZE.NET SO MUCH.
OH I FORGOT ONE MORE THING, YOU MUST KNOW...
AUTHORIZE.NET DEVELOPER CERTIFICATION PROGRAM
There is NOTHING AS SUCH & OUTSOURCED it to
Elance.com - a parasite.
LAST BUT NOT LEAST --- AUTHORIZE.NET CUSTOMER CARE # ON GOOGLE QUICK SEARCH IS - 1.888.437.0481 (WITH SOME MARKETING COMPANY) #HAHAHAHA
FUCK AUTHORIZE.NET BOYZ...
DONT FUCKING WASTE YOU TIME....
Finally I persuaded my client to opt for PAYPAL!!! HURRAY...
